New Dad Series

This post will be more gross than my previous ones, so I’ll try to make it short. Your baby is going to have a lot of snot at various times and they won’t be able to do anything about it. They can’t just grab a tissue and blow their nose, so they will remain congested and uncomfortable. You may have to get that snot out for them. One option is a bulb syringe, which is not always effective. Another good option is a snot sucker, where you actually suck out the snot yourself by using your mouth.

Before you get too grossed out and stop reading, I don’t mean you are literally sucking the snot into your mouth. The snot sucker has a filter on it. Basically, you put one end at the tip of the nostrils, and then from the other end, which is the mouthpiece, you suck and bring out the snot from the nasal cavity. Your baby will get some good relief from their congestion by doing this. Once again, there is a filter which will allow air to pass through, but none of the other matter. So, you will be fine. Still, it may feel a little gross, especially at first.

There are several brands out there on the market. We personally used the FridaBaby Snotsucker. After each use, we simply rinse it out with water and let it dry. Well, I hope you read this all the way to the end. I promise to write more palatable content in the future. Goodnight fellas!

Alright gentlemen, when you bring a new baby home, you will have to give them baths. Some parents bathe their newborns every night, others will do it every other night, or a couple of times per week. Whatever the case, they probably won’t be able to go under the heavy shower and rinse off. You will have to bathe them in some sort of tub. This is definitely a great bonding moment for both the mom and dad, so take advantage if you can.

The healthcare workers will go over this with you, but you won’t be able to submerge the baby in water for a while; generally, when the umbilical cord falls off and when circumcision site heals for boys. Also, your baby will get a sponge bath in the hospital when they are 24 hours old, and you are welcome to watch how it’s done. It’s true that any clean bucket will do, but let’s make our babies somewhat comfortable. There are many great baby tubs on the market. We have personally used the 4moms brand, which has a temperature gauge to make sure the water is not too hot or cold. The baby will appreciate that. Also, it has a plug that will release the water from the bottom when opened, allowing the old bath water to go out and fresh water to fill up when closed again.

The tub also has an infant insert for when they are newborn. This can be taken out once the baby reaches a certain size. I would recommend having two people help with bathing until your infant is at least able to hold their head up on their own. If you lose focus for a second, your baby’s head will go under water, which is highly dangerous. Of course, as I mentioned earlier, bath time is a great bonding experience, so participate in this activity for as long as you can. Have fun guys!

Alright gentlemen, you will be feeding your infant a lot. And by a lot, I mean at least every 2-3 hours around the clock, especially when they are newborn. You will have to warm up formula, or breastmilk, every time. Of course, if your partner is breastfeeding exclusively, then you’re set, at least for a while. However, if you believe you will be needing formula, or will be freezing breastmilk for later use, (i.e., your partner is producing a lot) then you will need something to warm up the milk for your baby.

You can use the traditional method of warming up some water on the stove and place the milk bottle in there for a certain amount of time. First, you’ll have to get the water to boil and then place the bottle inside boiling water. I have no idea how long this takes, but I imagine at least 10-15 minutes, which can feel like an eternity when you’re half asleep in the middle of the night and have a hungry baby screaming their lungs out. Microwaving the milk is not a good option because the milk will not be warmed equally, which will make it cold in some spot and hot in others.

Lucky for us, there are new options now. I Present to you, the Babybrezza, which is a milk bottle warmer that’s as easy to use as a television. Literally, you plug it in, add a tiny amount of water, place the bottle with milk inside, turn it on and push go. There are multiple time settings ranging from 1-9 and then a frozen setting, which can be used for unfreezing breastmilk from the freezer. Once you set the number, you push go and it warms it up. There is also a setting for room temp vs cold, if the milk or formula has been in the fridge. I generally use the 1 or 2 time setting which warms up the milk in less than 3 minutes.

After it’s done warming, pull the milk bottle out carefully, wipe off the condensation, and you’re ready to feed your baby. Don’t be alarmed by the steam. The milk does not get that hot. However, you can give it a minute just to be safe. Bottom line is, you will have warm milk for your baby within minutes by just pushing one or two buttons and it will save you so much time.

The best part is you don’t have to keep the warmer in the kitchen. It can be used anywhere there is a plug. My wife and I moved it to our room once we realized it was insane for us to be walking up and down the stairs multiple times in the middle of the night.

In a pinch, the babybrezza can also be used as a sterilizer. We were big on sterilizing our bottles after each use. While traveling and not having availability of a microwave or our sterilizer, we simply washed our bottles and put them for a few minutes in the brezza and were good to go.

This item cost $70, but it has been lifesaver in so many ways. It will be worth every penny by the end of the first week. As you can see, ours has been used and abused in the picture below. Lucky for us, we got it as a gift from a close friend. Of course, if we didn’t, we would have bought this quickly!

I was reminded just a few days ago that babies, just like humans, have preferences and these preferences can be based on their mood for the day, or even just in the moment. My son and I have a great relationship and bond. Even though he is just shy of eight months at the time of this writing, his smile, excitement, comfort level, and other factors show how much he loves us. You will have the same clues with your kiddo too. Some of the new dads probably already noticed them. It’s amazing watching kids grow and become their own person. It’s even more amazing watching them recognize you more and more and give you that heart-warming smile when you walk into the room.

One thing you will notice is that your baby will like certain foods, toys, shows, and people, etc. On some days, they will prefer one thing over another. For instance, they may want to eat sweet potatoes one day, and oatmeal the next. Hey, they’re just like us! Another thing is, there will be days where your baby can’t get enough of you. They will want you to hold them and be in their presence constantly. If you aren’t, they will voice their disapproval, even if they can’t speak yet. However, there will be others days where they want to be left alone, or even go to another person. Believe it, or not, no matter how strong your bond is with the kiddo, there will be occasions where they want to be held by someone else, or nobody at all.

On most days, my son loves being held by me and will easily fall asleep on my chest. A few nights ago, he was anxious, energetic, and looking around constantly for something, or someone. I couldn’t figure out why he was so wide awake, even though it was past his usual bedtime. I realized that he was searching for my wife, his mommy, and had his eyes locked on her when she walked into the room. When she laid down, our son crawled towards her immediately, and within minutes, was sound asleep. At first, I was a little bothered, saying to myself, “Why doesn’t he want to be near me?” However, I slowly realized that he needed mommy in this moment. He wanted her touch and to be in her presence. Some nights, our son wants to be with me, others, he wants mommy. Many nights, it doesn’t matter who, as long as one of us is there.

My point is, never take this personally. Your kiddo will have their preferences on certain days and their moods change, just like ours do. Cherish the moments when your kids can’t get enough of you, and understand the moments when they need some space.

Well, since you’re having a baby, or already had one, a stroller is going to be a huge part of your life for the next several years. I encourage you to do a lot of research before making this purchase because you want yourself and the baby to be comfortable. Pick the stroller that is affordable and fits your lifestyle. for example, if you’re active and move around a lot, a sturdy stroller that can handle different terrains is essential.

If I were to make a recommendation, I would tell you to get a Doona. My wife did a lot of research before making this purchase. We liked the larger wheels, how easily it can be adjusted, and also the fact that it doubles as a car seat. Yes, that’s right, a car seat and stroller in one. For those who have had kids, you will know how difficult it can be to strap a baby down. For those who don’t have kids yet, you will be finding out real soon. Imagine, if you will, that every time you go out, you have to switch the baby between the car seat and stroller constantly, and they’re crying and fighting every time. With a Doona, you can strap them in, and then push down the wheels to make the stroller a carrier and put it on the car seat base in your car. When you take the baby out of the car, simply lift the seat and open the wheels back up again.

The Doona is sturdy, but also light weight. Of course, as your baby gets heavier, it might not seem so light anymore, but I digress. The Doona has done us wonders, especially since my wife and I travel so much. If we had to move our baby from a stroller to car seat, and vice versa, all the time, our workload would literally double. Many veteran parents we know have commented about how lucky we are that this product exists now. It is a true convenience. Believe me, we are grateful.

Bottomline: Do your research and pick the stroller that is best for your guys and the baby. Maybe it will end up being the Doona. Good luck and have a great day!

Hey guys, I know it’s been a while, but I will try my best to keep posting regularly. With the new baby, work, business, writing, and trying to sleep, it can be challenging. Anyways, I hope all of you are well. I want to take the time to discuss traveling with a baby. For those out there who are wanderlusts, like my wife and me, you may be worried about not being able to travel any longer. I am here to say that is not the case. Even with a new baby, you can still travel and enjoy life. We have taken our baby to numerous restaurants, stores, and attractions. Recently, we went on a road trip from Colorado to California and back. We have been on numerous road trips and this one was different, but we still got it done.

I encourage all of you to continue to do the same activities in life that you were doing before having a baby. Provided they are healthy activities. Your life does not end when you have a baby, but it certainly changes. However, don’t be afraid to keep many things the same. Just know that another little human will be joining you and they will rely on you for everything. That means a lot of extra supplies, like diaper bags, toys, medications, and various forms of entertainment will be coming along. And don’t forget about the extra time you need at every moment. Spontaneity and just being able to get up and go is out the window.

That being said, having your little kiddo join you on adventures is a blast. Even though our son is only 5 months old as of this writing, it was great to take him to many of the locations we have visited numerous times, like Manhattan Beach, Hollywood, and various restaurants. So, how did the road trip go? Overall, pretty well, but there were more challenges and changes we had to make from previous trips. First of all, there was more space taken up in the car due to an extra luggage filled with clothes, burp cloths, bibs, etc. Yes, even though your kiddo is small, they will need a lot of clothes, especially with how many times you will have to change them. In addition, we had to account for things like strollers, car seats, toys, and other necessities, like a bottle warmer and sleeper. We had to improvise in some ways during travel. For instance, we have a sterilizer at home, but couldn’t really bring it with us. So, my wife bought some sterilizing bags that she could stick in the microwave with bottles in it. Also, since our kid is around the age of teething, we brought the proper equipment needed for that, like drops for pain and teething rings.

As I mentioned before, managing time will be important. Before, my wife and I could just get up, shower, and get ready to leave with no real issues. Now, we must also make sure our kiddo is taken care of with feedings, changings, comfort, and any necessities needed while out and about. If you can change and feed your baby right before going out, that’s best. Then you will likely have a couple of hours before they will need these things again. Of course, babies are unpredictable. Also, be aware of things like the need for changing tables for when they soil their diapers, which again, can happen at any moment. Believe it or not, many restrooms still do not have changing tables. We’ve run into this a couple of times. We had to improvise by changing the baby in the car, or while in their stroller. Make sure to have bottles and formula on hand with easy access. If you’re using formula for feedings, of course.

During our road trip, we always made sure to have plenty of formula, clean bottles, clothes, blankets, pacifiers, and any other thing our baby needed readily available. Also, DO NOT forget about forms of entertainment. When your baby is a newborn, they will sleep more often, however, once they reach like three or four months old, they will become more aware and need to be entertained in some way. For our son, he slept often, but would also wake up and become fussy at times. We were always right there to feed him, comfort him, talk to him, and provide him with nursery rhymes to watch. It definitely got us through some tough moments. Also, be aware of your surroundings for safety. One thing we took into account were areas of the country where no services were available. For instance, in parts of Utah, there are long stretches of highway where nothing is available for hours. Make sure you know where these places are and take care of your baby’s needs before entering these stretches.

Realize also that your baby will have limits. If you are someone who can be out all day and night, this may become more challenging with a baby, who will need to be taken care of frequently. I generally made the drive from Aurora, CO to Los Angeles, CA in one day. However, the baby only had a limit of about 10-12 hours in the car. Therefore, we had to stop outside of Vegas somewhere and then drive the rest of the way on the second day.

I cannot prepare you for every scenario, but I can say that taking trips with a baby definitely changes things. Just realize that alterations will need to be made, so be flexible. Start small if you can. Take a short road trip to a nearby town or even a short flight. Test how things go and move up from there. Bottomline: you can still travel and enjoy life with your baby, just make the proper adjustments, don’t be worried about being overprepared, and go with the flow. Have a great time everyone!

For those dads out there wondering if they should be in the delivery room when their baby is born, the answer is, yes. The mother will need as much support as possible, and having someone she knows, and trusts, is essential. Who better than the dad, himself? I honestly don’t understand why dads wouldn’t be in the delivery room. I know in decades past that it wasn’t allowed, but now, without the restrictions, there is no excuse.

If you don’t believe being in the delivery room is important, then you are mistaken. The delivery process is grueling, intense, and painful. Also, one never truly know what will happen and if everything will turn out okay. The mother needs you in there as her partner. If you get disgusted by blood and body fluids and don’t want to be in there because of it, well, then suck it up and get over it. If that sounds harsh, well too bad. The mother also does not want to be in the position, pushing the baby threw, while her legs are up in the air with many people watching.

Not only does the mother need you, but the baby might also. Watching your baby come into the world and bonding with it is an amazing experience. Of course, I don’t want to assume everyone will have the same experience as me. That being said, if your partner is having your baby, get in that room and be her support system the best you can. Be there to hold her hand, give her sips of water, fan her down, and do anything you can to make her more comfortable. Just knowing that you are there for her will make a huge difference.

Many of you dads out there probably saw this title and wondered what the heck breastfeeding issues have to do with you. Well, I’m here to say, plenty. Your child will need to be fed, and quite often. If you and your partner have decided to breastfeed, then that’s great. If you decided not to and will be going the strictly formula route instead, that’s great too. I am not here to judge one way or the other. Both options are perfectly fine, and each provide great nutrition.

One question I have for you is: What will you do if your partner tries to breastfeed and is unable to because nothing is coming out? Before you answer, understand that this is a very real possibility. Some women are able to breastfeed immediately, and the milk just pours out. Other women have delayed lactation for several weeks. Some women only produce a small amount of milk and then supplement with formula until they are able to produce more. Unfortunately, some women are never able to produce the proper amount of milk for their baby, and others are unable to produce any milk at all.

What can you do to help? First of all, provide as much emotional support as you can. When a mother plans to breastfeed and can’t, for whatever reason, it can be heartbreaking. Therefore, always let your partner know that they are doing great and it’s not their fault if not producing enough milk. There is also much research you can do about increasing breast milk quantity, like taking various supplements, pumping, or massage. There are also lactation support groups out there, as well as lactation specialists. As well, have your partner reach out to other moms that she trusts. Basically, do whatever you can to help your partner improve her breast milk quantity and be there for her emotionally.

In the meantime, your baby still needs to eat. So, what do you do? The simplest thing is to buy formula to help supplement the breastfeeding. Whether your partner only makes a little breastmilk, or none at all, formula can provide the proper nutrition for the kiddo. If you and your partner are adamant about only breastfeeding, then there’s an option to purchase donor breastmilk from either a local hospital or milk bank. Be aware that donor breast milk is quite pricey. As your baby grows and takes in more ounces with each feeding, expect to pay several hundred dollars per week, if not more. To avoid breaking the bank, if you have a friend, or someone you trust, also nursing at the same time, you can ask if they have extra breast milk to spare. Whatever you feel comfortable with it, but that is an option. If the baby receives a small amount of breastmilk and then formula, they will receive the benefits of both.

Once again, the best thing you can do is be there for your partner and let them know they are no less of a mother because they can’t breastfeed like they want to. As long as you guys are doing your best to make sure your baby is well fed and taken care of, then you are doing a great job. You guys got this!

On a final note, if you happen to be in a position where your partner is producing an abundance of breast milk, then consider donating it. There are many parents out there who could use it for their babies, so contact a local milk bank or hospital so see how you can become a donor. Or reach out to a friend who may need it.

So, the day, or night, has finally arrived, and you are headed to the hospital with your wife or partner. She is going into labor and will have the baby soon. It could be a few hours, one day, or a couple of days based on the progress (dilation, effacement, water breakage, etc.) and many other factors.

In addition, the mother and baby will probably remain in the hospital or birthing center for at least 24-48 hours. It could be longer based on the health of the mother and baby and whether it was a C-section or regular birth. The bottom line is that you could end up spending several days in the hospital post-delivery, so it’s important to make yourself comfortable.

Hopefully, the mother made her own hospital bag well before she needed it. Help her create a list of things, so she doesn’t forget. As long as you have the most critical items, that should be good. But do your best to make sure the general comfort items are there. Try to get a tour of the birthing unit, whether in-person or virtual, where you will be going and find out what they have and don’t have so you can have a better idea of necessities to bring in. For instance, what kind of toiletries are available in the unit?

Now, as far as making your own stay comfortable as the dad, create your personal hospital bag. Once again, you could stay at the hospital for several days or more, so pack enough clothes. Having more than not enough is advisable. Remember to bring any item that you cannot be without for a day or two. Of course, consider the hospital or birthing center rules for personal items. If there is important paperwork that needs to be completed, bring it in and work on it during your downtime, which there will be plenty of. If there are snacks you enjoy, bring those as well. Bring a book, computer, or some type of entertainment, because chances are, you will be waiting around for several hours. If there is a special pillow you sleep on, bring it with you since the hospital pillows probably won’t cut it. Well, I hope you get the idea.

Basically, bring necessities and personal items you will need for several days. Don’t count on just running home all the time because you never know what will happen and when. The first 24 hours for us after the baby was born became a whirlwind, with all of the doctors and nurses checking in, various exams, procedures, feedings, diaper changes, visitors, photographs, and getting to know our baby. It was nonstop. I didn’t even get a chance to go home until we were actually discharged. Whatever downtime I did have was used to take a quick Power Nap or support my wife in some way.

There you have it. Whatever comforts of home you can bring with you, do so. However, just know that whatever you bring, you will have to take back and add all of the baby’s items to the pile, including the little infant. Finally, ask your partner if she needs to store something extra in your bag that did not fit into hers. Be a supportive partner from the start.

So, on February 8, 2023, my son arrived at 2:07 PM. Birth weight was 7 lbs, 3 oz. It was an amazing and surreal experience to see the birthing process from start to finish.

I love being a dad and that’s all I have to say for now. Dads, when your partner goes into labor, makes sure to be there for her and provide support every step of the way because it is an intense, painful, and emotional moment. She will need you by her side.